Sunday 31 March 2013

Home Is.... by Kim LeClair

I love Home?

Home is me + you?

Home can travel with me?
But sometimes home feels far away?

Does home have to built?
Or is home always there?

What do I mean when I say 'Feels Like Home'?
Why is 'Coming Home' so powerful?

Home fully inhabits the comfort of the moment

Feels Like Home really does
Coming Home is powerful

Home is always there
And a home can be built

Home can feel far away
But it also travels with me

Me + you is Home

Home is love.

Check Kim out at

Friday 29 March 2013

The Big Whole Wide World by Valarie Budayr

My flight number is being called over head. I’m happily getting ready to board. This time I’m going to Paris, last time I went to Sweden, and last week I made a wandering car trip on the back roads of Tennessee. It doesn’t matter where I’m going it only matters that I’m going.

Something happens when I get into travel mode, my daily life gets shut away and I live in the inspiration of the planet, the people, languages, cultures, and nature of this big wide world.

Traveling with me is always my trusty dusty notebook. When I’m in a tin can of an airplane is when most of my creative ideas come. For those 2 to 9 hours, my brain is completely flooded with ideas, creative moments, camera angles, music scores, book ideas, film ideas, and so on.

When I get off the plane or out of the car, I’m in a different world. A world of discovery. Everything is electrified, important, and a clue to one of my next creative endeavors.

Bringing Ideas to Life.......... 

When not on the road, I pull out all of those creative travel journals as well as all of my travel guides and get back into the zone.

Oftentimes I can recall the smells, what I ate, who I spoke with, what inspired me at that moment.

Once back in the travel zone it’s time to get creative. I make a cup of coffee, and start working on the next big project which has called my soul.

When we talk about our place while we are creative, my creative canvas is the big whole wide world and I am happy.

Valarie Budayr is the founder of Audrey Press and the award-winning and best-selling author of the book The Fox Diaries: The Year the Foxes Came to our Garden and The Ultimate Guide to Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. She is passionate about making kid’s books come alive and you can find her doing that on her popular blog and website, Jump into a Book. When she isn’t being bookie, she is very happily the mother of three uber creative children, married to a wonderfully patient man who has come to love yarn, and caretaker of one adored cat. Other creative interests are music, travel, knitting (a bonafide yarn harlot), and gardening. She loves living a daily creative practice, where even a good cup of coffee is art.

Wednesday 27 March 2013

Finding Home by Juli

I am not fond of flying.

Enough said. (I don't wish to dwell on it.)

Suffice to say that taking a picture of what lay outside my window on a recent flight - no small thing! What's an even bigger thing is the joy I found in doing it. In fact, I must have taken nearly 50 photographs on my combined flights to and from my destination.

So, what's flying got to do with finding home (other than the obvious, of course!)?

Well, for me, it's about finding home where ever you are. It's not so easy. I've learned it has as much to do with me being comfortable and 'at home' in my own skin as anything else.

Don't get me wrong. I still feel like I'm not 'at home' in lots of situations and lots of places. Sometimes I overcome it. Sometimes I don't. And, sometimes it takes a lot of energy for me to feel at home..and I don't want to work that hard..sometimes.

But, there are moments when I can find myself feeling at ease..feeling relaxed. If I can get past the fear, ease seems to follow.

And, as my recent flights seemed to prove, joy is also waiting in the wings!

Juli lives in Toronto, Canada.
She blogs at

Monday 25 March 2013

Square Pegs by Kelly Besecke

Jamie Ridler has a way with words.

I wanted to write something about the feeling of being a square peg that I think a lot of people face when they commit to creative living. But it would be easy for a post like that to come off as whining or "special" or something else that would tap right into our negative stereotypes of artists. Jamie encouraged me to write it anyway, saying, "I think that there is a hunger for some honest reflection on the challenges of creative living." And when I think about it that way—writing for people who are doing this thing and facing that challenge, rather than writing about some kind of "insider" experience for "outsiders"—then it feels easier and more worthwhile.

Because creative living does go against the social grain. A lot of the time, it seems to mitigate against getting that eight-to-five (or seven-to-nine) job that organizes most people's lives. It's hard to direct your own life and follow creative inspiration as an employee whose schedule and responsibilities are determined by others. So committing to creative living sometimes means sacrificing the sense of security, stability, structure, and definition that a job can provide, besides the money.

You live on the edge. You create everything on your own, every day. You never know what will come next. It's stressful. It's powerful. It's exhilarating. It's exhausting. It's creativity.

It's weird to have this thing that you feel like you have to do to be yourself but that doesn't fit the usual categories of paid employment and family life.

The creative process is weird. It can require a lot of down time—gestation time, mulling time, processing time, sitting-and-staring-into-space time. In a busy-busy, get-things-accomplished culture, this can feel like laziness. And when others witness it, they might not know what you're doing. They might not have any idea how to be with you while you seem to be so wholeheartedly doing nothing at all.

Creativity is expressive. It comes from within. It requires introspection. It's personal, individual—just each person's unique stuff being put out there in the world in the form of a song, painting, book, whatever. It's authentic giving, but it looks like self-absorption. Or like arrogance—as if I'm so important, as if what I have to say matters, as if my ponderings are worth the sacrifices of time and energy that could be spent helping others, contributing to something that matters, being productive, being a useful member of society, earning money, getting with the program, and being responsible.

But the thing is, it's what you have. It's what you have to give. This is what I have. This is what I can give, the best thing I can give, the thing that I give most naturally. The thing that I can keep giving and not run dry, run out of stamina and resources. Here you go.

Self-loathing—and its milder forms—is a thing, a possibility. It's easy to feel self-absorbed, useless, lazy, unnecessary, hopelessly out of it, and weird.

I mean, don't give into it, though. As I wrote that last paragraph, I knew that it sounded like words of defeat and depression. It isn't. Because you deal with that while you're living in integrity and feeling like yourself. You're doing your thing, you're in your groove, and you're certain about something. Most nights, you do know what you stand for.

The Creative Dream Journals theme for this month is Finding Home. Creativity is home. Your own process is home. And when you find like-minded others, they're your home. And when you settle in a city (like I have) that celebrates creativity and prides itself on weirdness, you're at home. And while you're in this cocoon, you kind of get the double win: you get to be yourself and be with others who think, "Okay, you're weird—but so are we all, and isn't that great?"

(Lewis Carroll's thoughts on the matter.)

Kelly Besecke writes about spiritual meaning, progressive religion, and authentic living. Her first book, You Can't Put God in a Box: Thoughtful Spirituality in a Rational Age, will be out later this year. Kelly is a dreamer, a thinker, and an incurable idealist who loves singer-songwriter music, impressionism, and every dog she's ever met.

Friday 22 March 2013

Finding My Way by Alli Vainshtein

How do you know when you have found your way? Is there one way for you to live your life or are there many paths that could equally be yours? I don't believe in fate. I think we choose our path, we choose our way in life, one decision at a time. I believe that I am always doing things my way in life.

I have a close friend who believed strongly in fate, she firmly believed that God had a path chosen for her. When we were young, she was decisive and firm about her decisions. She had focus, she had a goal, she was on her way to heaven and doing God's will. In our thirties, we both found ourselves divorced and back in our hometown. Suddenly, she felt that God had let her down, that she had done "everything right" and ended up in crisis. She cringed when people told her that "God doesn't give you more than you can handle" or that "all things work together for good."

She lost her ability to make swift decisions. One day she told me that when she came to a fork in the road, she spent so much time standing there trying to decide which way to go that I had already taken the wrong route, crashed, returned to the fork and changed paths while she was still standing there.

Part of my way is the way of the phoenix. My superpower in life is my flexibility and my ability to recreate myself. Who is the real Alli? They all are. I am a multifaceted creature. I make quick decisions and continue running down my path in life. I have made many different types of choices. I believe I was true to myself through it all. I have entertained many different points of view. They are all valid, real, and beautiful in their own way. I am ambidextrous and I use both sides of my brain. Life is a journey and I can't define myself by any one point in time. I am evolving and my reality changes with each new day.

I am more than a chameleon because I don't seek to blend in with the normalcy of the world.

I seek the paths that are not popular. I love doing jobs that others won't or can't do. I love challenges and difficult journeys.

The surest way to get me to do something is to tell me that it is impossible.

I firmly believe that there is always a way. I have to be willing to make sacrifices, but what is the sacrifice when compared to the goal, the problem solved, the new path discovered?

My life is all about yes. It's all about finding ways to make things happen.

I am looking for a new path now, one that will enable me to help others transform themselves. I want to share this phoenix life. I see women around me on the road to destruction with an attitude that they have no choice. I don't think it's necessary to crash and burn before the transformation. I just know that once you crash and burn, when all you have left are ashes, the only hope you have is that phoenix seed. The only way is transformation. Crisis takes away the option to hang on to the old way of living. Crisis makes change easier.

I want to learn to use my phoenix seed before I am in the ashes. They say it can't be done, that's why I know I have to learn to do it.

Alli Vainshtein is a community college instructor in tropical southern Minnesota. She lives with her husband, Igal, and a feline dictator named Pooh. She is working on her doctorate in organizational management and leadership, with a dissertation on the transformational journey of entrepreneurs starting new ventures during an economic crisis: emerging from the ashes.

Wednesday 20 March 2013

Travelling and The Art of Finding Your Place by Angel Young

Acceptance. It's really the key to finding your place in the world. It's that recognition that you like this, but not that - you like to draw in charcoal, but not pencil, or you like Fuji film more than Kodak. Or hot countries more than cold. We all spend some much time trying to fit in with how we think we should be. But this doesn't take us closer to our soul, but further away from it.

Until my early twenties I felt like I just didn't fit in anywhere. I couldn't find my place, but I couldn't seem to squish myself into the hole I was supposed to be occupying either. I imagine this feels quite familiar for many creatives. In a way that's to be expected - I'm a great believer that artists pave the way for society to follow, as they navigate the not-so-comfortable cutting edge.

With creativity comes sensibility. A sensitivity to the world, or your medium. That's the thing to embrace. Finding your place is all about where those sensitivities can flourish. 

I've been thinking a lot about our place in the world, as we start to tidy up our house to put it on the market. We've packed some of our clutter away and I miss it already. It's not that we're going far, but I do feel a loyalty to our 1870s house, with it's lovely open fire and cosy "workers" cottage feel, and a front door which opens straight into the living room. Still I'm looking forward to the perfect house coming our way, with enough space for creativity and kids and still room to swing a cat. 

But while the move will be important, I know that for me coming home to myself often involves a journey. My nomadic soul loves to move and somehow this brings me closer to myself. I find it can be very creative. The journey shakes away the stresses of day to day life. It provides a hiatus that allows the words to flow, or the inspiration of a different perspective to come into my photography. And I love the silence that travelling can bring. 

But I didn't really find my place until I went to India, one of the noisiest places on earth! When I arrived I was an over sensitive person who cried too much. By the time I left I had begun to connect with who I was for the first time. The difference? In India being "tuned in", having a spiritual take on life, is normal. I met loads of people who were just like me. They interacted with the world like I did, and then gave me the language and tools to start working with the sensitivity that had felt so wrong up until that meeting. I learnt to meditate, to use and trust my intuition. To understand I wasn't imagining the things I "saw" "knew" "understood" beyond the normal world. I accepted my true nature. 

Don't get me wrong it was not the easiest journey - not physically nor emotionally. And it's been a long road too. India was my beginning. It opened the door. But I couldn't have survived in this world without the skills I learnt there. I like to say - I met a monk and it changed my life. It's true. It did. But the reason it did was that I was "seen" as I truly was for the first time in my life without judgement or rejection. Today, try to set aside the judgements you have about yourself and just respond to your own preferences. Allow yourself to be as you are, and that will take you closer to finding your own place in this beautiful and complicated world. There is, after all, room for us all.

Angel lives in the UK and is dreaming of a beautiful new house in which to thrive.

Monday 18 March 2013

Afraid of the Light by Aimee Cavenecia

When do you feel your best?

When do you not feel your best?

What gives you energy, inspires you & lifts your spirit?

What takes your energy, leaves you uninspired & low in spirit?

When was the last time like you felt fulfilled, content & complete?

When was the the last time you felt unfulfilled, discontent & incomplete?

Take the time to answer the questions. Don't formulate the answers, just allow them to present themselves. Quiet down, relax, & allow the answers to effortlessly appear. Write down the first thing that pops in your mind after reading each question. Don't edit the answer. Don't second guess it. Just write it down & accept it.

Notice. Simply notice all of the answers. Noticing is one of the most profound steps someone can take to transform their life. It's effortless, but it's daunting. For some it is scary. Because once they see what is going on, they will never be the same. They will forever be awake to what is happening in their life. They can no longer sleep-walk through their days & then wonder why they always feel tired, or always feel like year after year, they never reach their desired destination.

Begin to see what is there, & you will not only see that what is making you unhappy is being chosen (by you) repeatedly, over & over again -- but you will also see that the peace, joy, energy, & inspiration is always there for the choosing as well.

Imagine a room in your house is buried with things that are unwanted, unsuitable for you, or unneeded at the present moment. Because of that, you will not be able to see the things that are the most appropriate for you; the things that are perfect for you in this moment. It also doesn't allow any room for anything new to come into your present life. That cluttered room is filled with the past. Past choices. Past solutions. Past desires. Things that no longer serve you.

Maintaining a jumbled existence doesn't allow for room to play freely. It makes it difficult to see & choose what might serve you best now. Spaciousness (physical & mental) is the freedom that many of us are seeking. And it's not found in more stuff, or more experiences. We have plenty of those! It is found in being spacious. Being clear. Being open. Being ready & available to what might come our way next.

One way to be clear, is to clearly see. To see what is already there, right in front of you. Be clear about it. Then begin to dig, & clear out what is behind it. Go deep. Don't be afraid to excavate (figuratively & literally). Dig & clear out your stuff. It's taking up space, & it's blocking you. These blocks (stuff being held, be it mental or physical) impede your energy flow. They also block the light. This heaviness or tiredness that people feel is often because they feel weighed down by the things they are carrying unnecessarily. Physical & mental blocks (or baggage) are two sides of the same coin. Therefore, both need to be cleared out. Both need your attention.

Awareness is key. Without that, you are lost. You'll be on the hamster wheel of life, wondering why you are always chasing after something (or being chased by something). Wondering why you are always falling short of your self-expectations, falling short of what you know you are capable of being or achieving. To meet your best self or your best life, you must first meet who you are now. Have you really met you? Or do you constantly avoid you? I know that sounds funny or silly -- but I'm being serious. So many of us are moving through our lives so fast, & we are so busy with work or family or entertainment, that we haven't really sat with ourselves. When I say sit with ourselves, I mean with open eyes & open arms. We haven't said, "Ah. I see you! I see how you have been hiding. And I see that you are buried. I love you. And I am going to unearth you, unburden you. I'm going to set you free."

It's simply an act of self-love. And unconditional love of 'the self,' is unconditional love of all selves (all people). So self-love isn't a selfish act, it's a self-less act. There is no separate self, separate from the rest of the world. Also, your life is a mirror. When you see love & perfection (or hate & imperfection) in you, you see it everywhere. Meet yourself where you are today. See what you see & feel at this moment. At this stage in your life. Meet yourself where you are. Then develop the relationship from there. Your relationship to the whole world will improve.

Don't be afraid of the light. Just as you shouldn't be afraid of the dark. Shouldn't isn't the right word. What I mean is, accept it. Embrace it. Make peace with both light & dark. Find the balance & the harmony between the two, & you will find harmony & balance within yourself. Make friends with the unknown. Meet what scares you. Sometimes the thing that we are most afraid of, is the very thing that would serve us best.

Aimee Cavenecia (also known as AimeeLovesYou) is an author & activist who is currently igniting a Bliss & Self-Mastery revolution through her weekly blog Sunday Is For Lovers. Aimee's life-work is to share her insights on Seeing, Loving & Being (SLB), as well teaching meditation to people globally via the internet.

Friday 15 March 2013

imagine possibility.... by Lisa DeYoung


Reading this excerpt from Mary Oliver's poem, Wild Geese, gave me pause to reflect my sense of place in the world.

I truly feel at home where I live – the wide open sky (which is in the photo above), the sound of the river flowing, the mountains that surround me, my friends and community, the little house that I share with my hubby, my studio and online community...

And yet sometimes I feel lonely and out of place – comparing myself to others, feeling I am not enough.

I love the idea that the world offers itself to your imagination.

Our imagination holds so much possibility.

When I find myself feeling lonely and out of place, I will turn to my imagination – and possibility.

How can your imagination help you discover your sense of place in the world?

Artwork Note: If you've seen my first few posts on Creative Dream Journals (here and here), you will know that each includes a piece of my lettering art. It is my intention to share a piece of my art each month – as an exploration in my love of lettering, and turning to my imagination for possibility. My imagination, and trust, will be key in this sharing as I draw inspiration from other artists, strive not to compare myself, and shed feelings of not enough. Thank you for coming on this journey with me. I'd love to hear your thoughts on my work!

Lisa, aka the mountain mermaid, is a creative, independent spirit who loves to explore and play outdoors. She lives in the Rocky Mountains of Colorado. Embracing her creative life is an ongoing adventure, a journey that she loves and trusts more each year – and hopes to inspire others to do the same. She is also an entrepreneur providing innovative business support, including graphic design services, for passionate creative entrepreneurs.

Wednesday 13 March 2013

Finding your place – the identity crisis by Glenda Myles

Our theme this month is Finding Your Place. When I first heard it, I thought about the journey many of us are on to find our true place, that place where we exist as the best expression of ourselves, the place where we can be.

Part of that journey for me has involved a bit of an identity crisis. If I am looking for that place where I can be the best expression of myself, don’t I need to know who the heck I am first?



1. The collective aspect of the set of characteristics by which a thing is definitively recognizable or known.
2. The set of behavioral or personal characteristics by which an individual is recognizable as a member of a group.
3. The distinct personality of an individual regarded as a persisting entity; individuality.

How are our dreams rooted in our identity? Or how are we held back from fulfilling our dreams because of the attachment we have to an identity? Is that identity a true reflection of you?

Do you identify as an artist? Does this impact the choices you make, the clothes you wear, whether you have a tattoo or not, how you wear your hair, or the friends you have?


I remember about eight years ago, someone sent around this game at the office. For each person, you had to put a few adjectives that best described them. It was meant to be fun and light-hearted. When I saw the words that people used to describe me, I was shocked and devastated.

Now, don’t get me wrong. They weren’t “bad” words, no one thought I was evil or anything (or at least they didn’t say that at the time), but they weren’t words that I wanted to have etched on my tombstone either. Ambitious, driven, hard-working, etc.

It was how I got work done, but I was more than my work, wasn’t I? This wasn’t me.

It wasn’t long after that I was in a car accident that changed my life. In fact, I often think of my life in terms of pre- and post-accident, like these times are separate entities somehow. With time off from work, a broken body, and a loss of who I thought I might be, I had to come to terms with my identity.

If this was how people saw me and I didn’t want it to be, what is a true reflection of who I am really? What could I do to present that to the world and have it reflected back?

Flash forward. Many people may still use some of those words to describe me, it hasn’t gone away. But I don’t think it would be the only words they would use. I have stripped myself of my attachment to many things and continue to do so. I now make decisions not based on external norms, but based on what I really want. I live in better alignment with how I feel inside and how that is expressed externally.

As I begin to better understand who I am and who I want to be, I am able to find the spaces, places, and people that support me, that nurture those things that I wish to emulate, that accept me for all of who I am. I am also able to let go of my need to be accepted in places that don’t.


Are you dreaming of a life that is vastly different than your current one and are frozen with fear because in order to change you need to release your attachment to your current identity? Sometimes we need to tear down walls in order to build something new.

Glenda is a healer, coach, and teacher as a doula, educator, reiki practitioner, dance facilitator, kundalini yogi, and earth-medicine creator. She facilitates a new group called Awe-Inspiring Women, a community based on respect, support, education and, occasionally provoking a conversation, so that we can take responsibility for the world we've created and encourage a better world.

Monday 11 March 2013

Finding Light in Darkness by Susan Cadley

"I wish I could show you, when you are lonely or in darkness, the astonishing light of your own being." Hafiz

Have you ever been awakened from a deep sleep frightened and shaky from a nightmare? If so, the first thing you probably did was to turn on the light. When the light is turned on, the scary imaginings disappear and we are calmed eventually.

Being in darkness in our waking life can encompass many things including; depression, feeling stuck, lost, experiencing grief, or unending anxiety. When we feel hopeless, faithless, and empty it may seem we cannot even reach for the light, though it is always available to us.

I was recently listening to a radio show called “Speaking of Faith” on NPR about spirituality and recovery. The guest was a Native American from the Lakota tribe in South Dakota, named Basil Braveheart. Basil talked about his alcoholism and the last 30 years being in recovery. What struck me most about what Basil shared was his culture’s belief in embracing darkness, or in his words making it a “relative”, a member of his family by acknowledging it as his greatest teacher. He said that for him, this is when answers appeared and miracles occurred.

If you find yourself in a dark place, next time try to be aware and stop yourself from finding the fast fix. Sit with it a while and allow the message it has for you to appear. You can learn about who you are in this lost place. Your soul may be stopping you in your tracks for a reason. Listen.

The most common fear about acknowledging darkness is that it will never leave but quite the opposite is true. By ignoring it, it has to get louder to get your attention. It may feel as if you’re not moving, however there is greater force at work under the surface, a force that supports you on your path always. Marianne Williamson in her book Everyday Grace reminds us that “There is a light in all of us.” When we forget this, it is time to reach out to a friend, a favorite book, a community, to take your hand and help you see in the dark. When things feel hopeless, others can hold out hope for until you find your inner light again.

The dawn eventually returns.

Susan is a Licensed Psychotherapist and Soul Coach and sole proprietor of Living From Within, LLC. Through counseling, coaching, creative workshops, book studies, and writing, Susan guides you to hear and live the messages of your soul.

Friday 8 March 2013

Happiness in Me by Valarie Budayr

As I look back on my life and even now in my life, I’ve never been one that fits in. I’ve always phrased this as “ I’m not normal”. This usually mystifies people because I look like any other suburban house wife until you get a little bit closer.

I’ve always had my own way of doing things. I’ve never wanted to be like anyone else except when I’m wanting to be “normal and usual.” There was a time in my life after I got married where I really tried to be like everyone else. What followed was a deep depression, and a sense of failure. I just didn’t feel good or right in my own skin.

One day my husband looked at me and said, “Why not just be you? Those that love you will be right here and those that don’t get you don’t need to be. “ Such wisdom at the morning breakfast table.

It was then that I found my sense of place in my “work”, my creativity.

Whatever I’m creating is the right place for me. It’s when I’m at my happiest.

It’s become my habit when I’m feeling out of sorts or kind of funky, “Who are you trying to make happy ?” The answer to that question should always be “me”. Always. Yes there are those times when a child needs me, a neighbor, family members, but every day has to have a moment in it where I make me happy.

Today’s happiness came from taking this photo of the winter’s sky.

Valarie Budayr is the founder of Audrey Press and the award-winning and best-selling author of the book The Fox Diaries: The Year the Foxes Came to our Garden and The Ultimate Guide to Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. She is passionate about making kid’s books come alive and you can find her doing that on her popular blog and website, Jump into a Book. When she isn’t being bookie, she is very happily the mother of three uber creative children, married to a wonderfully patient man who has come to love yarn, and caretaker of one adored cat. Other creative interests are music, travel, knitting (a bonafide yarn harlot), and gardening. She loves living a daily creative practice, where even a good cup of coffee is art.

Wednesday 6 March 2013

Home is a Creative Practice by Julie Gibbons

Here's a question for you : how much stuff do you know, compared to how much of it you put into practice?

I am so often guilty of gathering the knowing and forgetting choosing not to do the practice.

Learning all of that cool stuff and not putting it to good use is a wee bit akin to owning an exercise bike and using it to hang up laundry.

My home is filled with stuff we've gathered to practice with. It's infused into our everyday, into every space, every room.

Most of it isn't left untouched for long, but I've been wondering : if home is a creative practice, can it still be called a home if no one is practicing?

I'm challenging myself to figure out how to put all of my knowing into practice this month.

It includes unearthing the exercise bike from the laundry ;)

Here's another question for you : what fabulous teachings have you learned which you could choose to practice more often?

Julie Gibbons enjoys art journaling, journal therapy and mixed media. Her passion is self discovery through intuitive, creative practice, to reveal personal patterns, symbolism & archetypes of the true self.
Blog & Website + Etsy

Monday 4 March 2013

Finding Home by Helen Yee

I grew up in the suburbs, in a predominantly white community and from the beginning I never felt I fit in. The taunting and comments about my Asian features, or my glasses, or being a “brain” cleaved within me a rift of otherness that was never to be soothed in the full comfort of belonging, feeling at home among my peers in the town I grew up in.

Those early conclusions that I’d never fit in didn’t make me completely miserable, but they have been annoying, muddy footprints trailing me in too much of my life experience. You may have heard that childhoods like this create people with a different point of view on the world, and maybe these odd ducks are more likely to become artists and creatives. At times I found a small corner of comfort in this idea, but mostly I still wanted an expansive yet enveloping feeling of home that I imagined everybody else just automatically had.

These days I feel I’m almost home but not quite there yet. From where I stand I can look back at the voyage I’ve taken, each step leading me closer and closer to knowing the nirvana I sought. I moved away from the hometown, met interesting and open-minded people at university, moved to a large and diverse city where I could blend in, met new friends, found some artistic communities that welcomed me. And after a long time I also found love. A friend once asked me what this kind of love feels like. My answer: “It feels like home in a person.”

Yes, most of the time I know my life is really good, and I’m grateful for true love, great friends, interesting and fun creative projects, talented collaborators, and a cozy and welcoming apartment in a fabulous city where people can be who they want to be. Yet those old muddy footprints continue to haunt me. If I’m still not feeling completely at home where will I find it?

I think I’ve already looked everywhere around me so now I’m left with the question: “What if the only way I’ll find home is if I know it within myself?” Hm. It looks like I’ve begun another journey toward home. Does this remind you of any stories, folk tales, myths?

Helen Yee is an improvising violinist, multi-instrumentalist and composer. Currently violinist for the eclectic string trio, Trio Tritticali she also performs on yangqin with Music From China. She considers the practice of improvisation in all its forms a profound teacher in art and in life.

Friday 1 March 2013

Your Infinite Creative Potential and Why it Means All Your Dreams Are Possible by Andrea Schroeder

With a paintbrush in one hand & a glitter-gun in the other, Andrea lovingly mentors men & women who want to lead creatively abundant lives — and do ‘impossible’ things, with ease & joy.