Friday 4 October 2013

My people: Coming From Crazy by Julie Rorer

Each family has its own difficult scripture - Chinese Proverb

Have you ever had one of those days when your family just makes you want to scream? If I didn't look so much like them I'm sure I’d wonder if I had been adopted. This would explain a lot. Sometimes I seriously just don't get them. Are these people from another planet? These frustrations inevitably lead to a sharp twinge of loneliness. After all, if you don't have your family, who do you have?

Luckily, for a long time now I've been gathering new family members. I call them the family I choose, and they are located all over the world. I’ve even been known to tell these people things like "You know, you are the sister I would have picked if I could have." My chosen family has kept me going through the years. They let me vent, they let me cry, they laugh with me and somehow (even though I am massively flawed) they continue to love me nonetheless all these years later.

The greatest and most amazing person in my chosen family is my husband. I'm still not sure how in the world we were able to find each other, and make it work for so long (coming up on 12 years) and through so much. The twenty-something Julie was not marriage material–not even remotely. Somehow though, he came along, wasn’t repelled by my rough edges, and we ended up married. We get each other. We frequently can tell what the other person is thinking, but not in a creepy way. At least not always in a creepy way. He is a kindred spirit, for sure, and I feel grateful everyday that somehow, someway, it keeps on working.

Everyone needs at least one person (and ideally a whole group) that gets us on that deep level, someone that we can hold close as family no matter whether we share the same blood. It’s far better to share a kindred spirit.

Known in certain circles as Danger Girl, Julie is never afraid to throw caution to the wind and take a chance. She’s been creating things since she was a little girl and shows no signs of stopping. As a grown-up (more or less) she’s created a bath/body products brand, launched the largest indie fashion website (at the time), learned to ride a motorcycle, and done various other things large and small. She lives in Austin, Texas with her husband and son and a yard full of lizards and is currently writing the book she’s been dreaming about for years.

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